These Are the People You Will Pitch To

E! is getting into "scripted" programming. This shouldn't be that surprising because whatever the hot trend is in Hollywood and entertainment, E! is always 50 years behind it.

Kinda like how they passed on the pitch for "Survivor" and a bunch of other reality shows that became huge, and were only dragged into the 21st century by the genius, innovative minds of Ryan Seacrest and Kim Kardashian.

They sent out a press release last week touting the new scripted stuff they have in development. Some of it was very strange - not that they were bad, it was just you'd have a hard time imagining that type of programming on E! "And after an all new Chelsea Lately, it's a period drama about the Vanderbilts!" Come to think of it, I can't think of anything good coming after "Chelsea Lately", except for maybe a gun going off in my mouth.

But one little nugget struck me. Not because it was amazing, but because it seemed to be the perfect summation of an idea that a TV executive would think was good.

So when you're thinking up show ideas, please remember this:

Dorothy: The drama focuses on a girl from Kansas City, who falls for a man and moves with him to the Emerald City to work at his Emerald Hotel. "What we loved about this is that it's such a fresh idea about an ingenue coming to the Emerald City, which is an overlay of Los Angeles, and what that's like," notes Berger. The hour-long project, which is inspired by the books "Dorothy" and "The Wizard of Oz", comes from writer Natalie Krinsky and Warner Horizon Television.


"such a fresh idea..."

The show is called fucking Dorothy! It's about a girl in fucking Kansas who goes to the fucking Emerald City!

Where do these dream makers come up with this stuff?

This made me laugh because it reminded me for the millionth time that they don't want fresh ideas. They want ideas that they understand, and that they've heard before. A fresh idea would scare the shit out of them. 

They're so confused about this that they think a show called Dorothy about a girl from Kansas transported to the Emerald City is fresh. It makes sense in their head, I guess.

But I think it's an important thing to remember when pitching. Don't reinvent the wheel.

It makes me so mad that I didn't pitch them my show about this naive girl named Alice who goes to Wonder Land (New York) and meets peculiar creatures (blacks, puerto ricans, whites).

Wait a minute...that might be good, that is fresh stuff! I even have an idea for a spinoff, it's called The Matrix.