Sorry About the Bachelor Pad Finale

Well, I didn't make it. What can I say? I forgot that in Arizona, prime time starts at 7 and the local news starts at 10. What a retarded, old person state. Fact is, I probably wouldn't have made it anyway. I worked from about 7am to 10:40pm. So I would've had 20 minutes.

But I've heard things...

First of all, and most importantly, Kasey finally acknowledged the frog voice! How brutal is it that this moment, a moment that I've been waiting years for, happened and I missed it? Life just isn't fair.

So he says it's a speech impediment? Is that real? You can have an impediment that makes you sound like a deaf guy? I guess I think of that as more of a stutter type of thing. But okay. When I get back from this trip I'm going to do some heavy research into this.

Second of all, I heard Ella's boobs are gigantic and she looks good. So I guess Erica's dad has his first success story.

Third, Holly and Michael shared the money, but Holly and Blake are engaged, and the engagement thing felt staged and weird. I'm going to have to watch to confirm, but sounds lame. Still, I think they deserve each other, and they did seem genuinely infatuated last week. I'm a believer.

And fourth, Jackie can't figure out why it didn't work out with Ames? Really? You can't put your finger on that one? He had to run off on one of his solo missions to the Far East and you're still drawing a blank?

Okay, that's it. Hopefully I'll get to watch soon. I apologize again.

One last thing: I know it was just 9/11 and everything, but that being said: fuck American Airlines and every fat black lady that works for them. They suck.

Also, being back on my old college campus is depressing. I can't believe I'm this old, and I can't believe I went to school with these maniacs.